Room for one more? ;) *vroom*

Dear Eli,

Are you fucking serious? 

I feel bad for the next vehicle that has to put up with your crazy ass.

Sorry not sorry,

Morty.

*vroom*

sliceofdeath:

wow they made such a big deal about frostival and it was crap. what so amazing happened there? fimogen and eclare? wowwww

ewwww

look at this fucking piece of bread. it’s in the shape of a fucking turtle. a fucking HAPPY turtle. god fucking dammit i want it

living the life

IT’S RAINING MEN, HALLELUJAH. 

me

Gross

I feel like ruining your night. 

It saddens me to say this, but I think it’s time for Morty to retire from the tumblr world. *sad vroom* I know I said I wasn’t going anywhere when I resurrected from the dead last Easter, but there really is nothing left for me to do here. Thanks to my amazing lady friends for showing me love. Morty loves you all. To my wives, thanks for being so hot. ;) To all my followers, thanks for everything, you guys rock. 

Now, I must vroom on up into the big car shop in the sky, again. Stay classy. :) 

*vroom*

-Sexbombmorty666

*sad vroom* :(

I had a great time with Eli and Imogen this past weekend. :) *vroom vroom*

Back to your old ways, eh? *vroom*

cfedey:

Pizza in the front, bodies in the back.